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Chapter 5: Why won't you have me (1)
"...."
"...."
Silence filled the room once more. Alicia held her breath and clenched her jaw. Cabelenus silently watched her expression and movements.
At some point, Alicia's eyes stopped trembling. She nodded weakly and her shaking hands were wrapped around her shoulders. There was a determined look on her face as if she had made a decision.
"Alicia Neustein," said Cabeleus when he realized that was Alicia was doing was not to protect herself. His voice rang throughout the room.
When their gazes met, her eyes wavered but her hands remained where they were.
Clink.
A gorgeous golden pin rolled onto the floor. At this, frown lines formed on Cabelenus' forehead.
Neustein's clothing was not sewn. Clothing pins are used on both shoulders or a belt is used to create pleats to adjust the cloth and create a stylish shape. Thus, a woman wearing only a layer of thin cloth could easily expose her skin.
Cabelenus clenched his teeth reflexively when he caught a glimpse of what was underneath. The cloth had fallen down about halfway.
"What are you doing?"
"Aren't you going to have me?" A faint smile appeared on her lips.
"Have you?" Cabelenus's eyes contorted noticeably.
He wanted to yell at her to put her clothes back on right away, but he was speechless as she had so pointedly uncovered his weakness.
He had never lacked women. Many had tried to seduce him, and some even willingly jumped into his bed naked, but he had never been swayed. The disgust he felt at the thought of having to touch another person's bare body was greater than his physical desire. But for some reason, he could not keep his eyes away from this rather plain woman.
"I'm not very experience, so I'm not sure if you'll get what you want, but I will not resist. You may do as you please."
"You don't seem repulsed by the invader who has destroyed her country, princess."
"I just know when to give up." Alicia lowered her gaze.
She was pretending to be composed, but she felt shame at having to kneel before this man. Just imagining what might happen next made her whole body tremble though she tried to resist.
"You're still sharp-tongued even though you're trembling in fear."
"This is all I can do."
"Then why don't you ask for something using that clever tongue of yours? Beg for your safety. None of that pitying nonsense you spoke of at the trial." Cabelenus looked down at Alicia with a scornful gaze.
Alicia's skin looked more pale than white against the red hair that framed her face.
"All that I wish for is there be no senseless deaths."
"Are you being honest?"
"It's better for someone who wants to live to survive than someone who doesn't." A thin exhale escaped her lips.
Cabelenus turned away from her with great effort and firmly grabbed the brooch that fastened his cloak. Only then did Cabelenus realize why Alicia had that look in her eyes.
It was because she had no desire to live.
"If you want to die, just end your life," Cabelenus said as he clicked his tongue. Alicia's expression remained unchanged.
Cabelenus frowned even deeper. He thought her foolish of daring to speak though she was clearly petrified, and seeing all the scared on her body displeased him. It bothered him that he felt this way.
"This is no fun..."
Cabelenus looked at Alicia with a face more bitter and icy than any winter storm, then turned around and left the room. Only the brooch that had been crushed beyond recognition was left on the floor when he had stood.
What was that man thinking?
Alicia blinked repeatedly. A month had passed since the castle had been taken over.
Even children knew that many things had changed and that things would keep changing. The castle, once called Neustein Castle, was now called Weizen, and was now filled with new people and things to reflect the name change.
Day by day, things grew gradually more and more stable, and the once bloody castle was now being prepared to welcome its new ruler. Alicia was the only unchanged thing in it.
"Your scars have improved considerably. I will prescribe a new medication for you."
The old doctor smiled kindly and even applied medicine on Alicia's back. Alicia wiggled her toes, trying in vain to keep herself from laughing because of the tickling sensation on her back.
The only surviving member of the Neustein royal family, her status has been downgraded to that of a slave, but paradoxically, Alicia's life was better than before.
"Now that you're done with your treatment, I'll tell them to bring in your meal." said her maid who had been standing by her side while the doctor examined her.
Ever since she was branded as the "grand duke's woman," nobody dared to bother her.
And yet, he never laid a finger on my body......
Cabelenus brought Alicia to his bed every night, but he didn't do anything. He came to her in the night and left in the morning. That was all.
"You have to eat well." said the maid when Alicia merely stirred the soup with her spoon.
Her maid was quite sensitive about Alicia's nutrition. When Alicia refused to eat, Cabelenus once threatened that if Alicia resisted food, he would cut off the heads of everyone in the castle. Alicia carefully glanced at the maid and managed to bring a spoonful of soup into her mouth.
"Try the other things, too. Everything here was made especially for you by the chef."
The maid explained to Alicia how the food was prepared and how special the dishes were in an effort to stir Alicia's appetite, but it was no use. The soup with various ingredients, cooked by the best chef in the kingdom, was the most delicious soup Alicia had ever tasted, but because her food intake had suddenly increased of late, she didn't have much of an appetite. Had it not for the maid's terrified look, Alicia probably wouldn't have finished her bowl.
"Don't you like it? If there's anything you'd like to eat, please let me know."
There was one thing Alicia could think of. A soup her mother used to make which was quite tasteless. It was made with unknown greens and water to increase quantity, not all these ingredients the chef used. Had it been that, she might have been able to finish it, but her mother was no longer on this earth,
"No, this is enough." Alicia lowered her head and quietly drank her soup.
But no matter how many spoonfuls she ate, the feeling of emptiness in her stomach never went away.
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